Biblical Headship in the Home: The Call to Husbands and wives to display the gospel in marriage.
Perhaps no biblical truth is challenged in today’s culture as is the Bible’s teaching on Gender differences, and roles within the home and the church. In our first installment on Tuesday’s Truth, we saw that Gender is God’s Design. Last week we saw God has ordained men to be the leader’s in the church, and that was rooted in a creation principle, not a cultural problem.
Today, we turn our attention into our homes, mainly God’s design for husbands and wives within the context of marriage, in Ephesians 5:22-33.
In verses 22-24, Paul encourages wives to submit to, or be subject to their own husbands.
Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. But also the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in every way.
First we see the command. Wives are called to be subject to their own husbands. The word be subject to is the Greek word, hypotassō, and it has as its origin a military being organized under the command of a leader. Just as a military would submit to their leader, otherwise chaos would ensue, a wife is to follow the leadership of her own husband. It is not because she is somehow inferior. Even in a military, there may be someone smarter than the leader, but there is still a hierarchy to promote order.
Even within a Christian home, a wife may have more biblical or theological knowledge than her husband, but that doesn’t give her a pass at the call to submit to her own husband. God has established a design for the home.
Second we see that she is to submit to her own husband. She is not commanded to submit to all men in general. A woman is called to submit to her own husband. Why? Because the husband is the head of the wife in the same way Christ is also the head of the church.
Here we see the motive. Men are to reflect Jesus and his shepherding leadership and care over the church in how they lead their wives. When a husband is reflecting Jesus as head, a wife can joyfully submit to her husband. In the same way, a wife displays the gospel in submitting to her husband as the church submits to Christ.
The rest of the section is addressed to husbands.
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, so that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the Word, that he might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but she would be holy and blameless.
In these three verses, 25-27, we see that a husband is to love his wife, in so doing he is to display the gospel, demonstrating the love that Jesus has for the church. Jesus demonstrated his love in giving himself up for Her. A wife submits to her husband as the church submits to Christ, and a husband loves his wife and lays his life down for her, as Jesus does for the church. Marriage is to be a beautiful, visible picture of the relationship of Jesus with his bride.
Husbands love their wives by seeking their sanctification and growth in the Word. This is what Jesus does for the church, and a husband should lovingly lead his wife by pointing her to God’s Word over and over and helping her to grow in holiness.
Husbands must cherish their wives:
SO husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves His wife, loves himself, for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of His body.
Through the gospel, we become members of one body the church. In the same way, husbands and wives manifest this union with Christ and the church through our union together, as we become one flesh. Paul even quotes Genesis in verse 31, “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother, and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.
Reading in Genesis, this seems to refer to marriage, but Paul says, “This mystery is great, but I am speaking in reference to Christ and the church. Just as Jesus left his father and took on flesh, and joined himself with sinful humanity, becoming one body with the redeemed. Husbands leave their father and mother, becoming one flesh, or one body with their wives.
The way a husband clings to his wife and makes that relationship top priority, and the way he nourishes her, cares for her, and cherishes and values her, reflects Jesus commitment and care to His bride, the church.
The roles and relationships within marriage are not interchangeable. God has a clear design for marriage that is intended to give a visible picture of the gospel, the relationship Jesus has with his redeemed in dying for the church, cleansing the church, and cherishing the church.
May we as believing husbands and wives fulfill our God designed roles in the home as we display a vivid picture of glorious gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ, who gave himself for us.
